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Naturalist-style illustration of a tall plant-based humanoid cryptid composed of vines and stalks, standing at the edge of...
Documented
Case File #VEG-009

Veggie Man

Telepathic Tangle‑Weed of Marion County

Phytanthropos marionensis hematophaga (highly contentious)

LocationFairmont/Rivesville, Marion County, West Virginia
First Doc.1968
RegionAppalachia

Case Sections

In Review

The entity stands over 7 feet tall, thin and reed‑like, with a semi‑human outline built out of plant matter rather than flesh—green stalks, vines, and fibrous tissue where muscle ought to be. Its head bears large, pointed ears and striking eyes that reportedly shift from red to yellow, giving the sense of a traffic light deciding whether or not to ruin your evening. Arms are long and whip-thin, "like river reeds," ending in fingers tipped with suction cups studded with needle‑like thorns capable of piercing skin. Overall effect: a walking bundle of weeds that someone prayed over the wrong way.

Declassified Briefings

Form No. ACD-47B
Rev. 08/1972
Internal
File Copy
Appalachian Cryptid Division
Department of Unexplained Phenomena
Internal Memorandum
To:Field Research Division
From:Regional Director
Date:[CLASSIFIED]
Re:Veggie Man - Case VEG-009
On paper he reads like kudzu that found religion and a thirst for O‑positive, but locals mostly treat him like that weird cousin who swung through once in '68 and never came back. Until we see a second data point, Veggie Man stays filed under "one‑time visitor, probably not from around here"—but agents in those woods are still advised to treat fast‑talking shrubbery as a bad sign.
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